School and Why I Hate It

I know I haven't done of one of these posts in a while and I'm sorry. I have been very busy.  I got done with school and was thrown straight into working almost every day. And while I love my job it's been stressful for me.

I just got back from vacation and it was exactly what the doctor ordered. I spent a few days not doing much and my poor brain needed a break.

Now I'm being thrown right back into work. The summer is halfway over and I don't feel like I've done anything useful with it. And it's killing me because I know I'll have to go back to school soon. That's the last thing I want to do.

I hate school, always have. I hate the deadlines, the pressure and how it demands to be the most important thing in your life. You have a social life? When August/September comes around, you can say good bye to that.

Especially when you have a job as well. My job is taking up all of my weekend nights right now and I keep having to say no to doing things with friends. And it doesn't help that I am a night owl and that I feel my best at night.

I feel like our school system is really messed up. It's considered normal to be so stressed out that you have at least a couple breakdowns during the year. It's considered normal to have so little time to yourself that you burn out. My age group is statistically the most lonely. It should not be that way. We don't have time to foster and grow healthy relationships. We rarely see people unless it's in class or for a project or for work.

Movies and TV portray college to be like:

You know, studying with friends, laughing having a great time.

Let me tell you, IT"S NOT LIKE THAT.
Not unless you're going to school to study something you're really passionate about and you have fantastic friends that help you study and don't distract you.

Hold onto that if you have it.

What college really feels like most of the time is this:

Obviously each of us would have different titles on those books, but the principle is still there.

They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but sometimes I think the stress of work and school and life in general will just leave me curled up in a corner, hissing at anyone who tries to approach.

On that note, no matter where you are, in school or out of school, have a great week. You are loved. I will write you later.

Heart Knowledge

People can tell you things all your life, you can memorize them and recite them word for word, but what good are they if they don't sink in?

How long does it take for the knowledge in your head to get to your heart?

I ask this because of something that happened recently. I was working on a voice over assignment for school (I had to read a commercial and record it) and I told one of the guys I work with about it.

Now, to understand this, you need to know where I work now. I work at a radio station with the host of the number one talk show in my area. This was the guy I told about my voice over project and he actually offered to help me with it.

Think about that for a second. This professional talk show host (who I actually think is pretty cool) offered to help me with a school assignment. Holy crap. Ok, now we can continue.

Needless to say, I was a little intimidated. I was quite scared to try anything in front of him for fear of failure. He could see that. He asked me to do a witch's cackle for him and I couldn't do it for the longest time. I can't do a witch's cackle! Not a good one anyway. So I couldn't do it at first and he had me do a bunch of other things like bark and act like a monkey.

This was what he said after that. He gave me a few tips and told me to not think when I read my commercial. And it was great advice. The problem was, that's easier said then done. So I managed to actually do a witch's cackle, but it wasn't anything like I thought it should sound like.

He told me my main problem was my lack of confidence and to get out of the way of myself. I almost broke down right then and there. I got so frustrated with myself because people have told me that and I just can't do it. It's hard!

People have told me that before. And I think they're right. I need to stop being afraid of looking stupid and go out there and live my life. I'm slowly getting better at it, but I'm not where I want to be. There is a difference between knowing something in your head and knowing it in your heart and soul.

That's Not My Name

So, my name is Goldie, believe it or not. Before you ask, yes, it is my real name. It is the name that is on my birth certificate, it is the name that my parents gave me. I was named after my great grandmother.

Now, I like my name. However, there are very few people with the same name. I have never met anyone with the same name as me, except on the phone. So, whenever I introduce myself to new people, there is always some sort of reaction to my name. I've heard just about everything, but there are five things I hear the most often.

Here are the top 5 things that people say when they learn my name.

1. "Is that your real name?"
I've already mentioned this, but it's the thing that the most people say, so it's worth mentioning again. I just sigh whenever someone asks me this now. I've actually started introducing myself like I did in the beginning of this blog.

2. "Oh, like Goldie Hawn?"
Yes, like Goldie Hawn. No, I was not named after her. I just recently got asked this by a guy who was my age. Normally it's older adults that ask me this, but when this 20 year old guy asked me, I was bit surprised.

3. "What?"
Either they didn't hear me or they think they heard wrong when I get this response. And I have to wonder, what do they think is my name? Cody? Colby? Those are the two names that I mistake myself when they're shouted out in a crowd. They sound a lot like Goldie and it's kind of disappointing when you think someone is calling you and it turns out they're shouting for someone else.

4. "Goldielocks!"
This is the one I hate. All the others are fine, but I really don't like being called Goldilocks. I'm not sure why, but it's always made me really annoyed. I actually shoved a kid in 5th grade because we wouldn't stop calling me it. When you first meet me, I give you one chance to call me that. After that, it's your funeral.

5, "But you don't have gold/blonde hair!"
No, really?! Are you sure? This normally follows after being called Goldielocks. I've had dark brown all my life, I'm quite aware that I am not a blonde, thank you for the observation. And the part that makes me laugh the most about this is that quite often they think they are the first people to point that out.

People also quite often tell me that it's a cool and unique name and I like that. Even if it's after one of the five things that I wrote about. I love my name and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

So, until the next time I write a blog, goodbye and have a great week!